7 Types Of Girls You End Up Dating In Singapore!
(Disclaimer: Pardon the “don’t give a flying fcuk” about grammar, and the use of Singlish. Without which… this post will be too awkward to begin with. Some (uptight & white-knight) guys and (feminazi) women will get offended by this, but hey… it’s satirical. Are you Batman or what? Why so serious? lol)
Favorite shopping haunt Haji Lane. Only dines at cafes that serve Kopi Latte. Refuses to step into old school kopitiam or hawker center because “hair will smelly”. Talks with angmoh accent, usually sounds fake or try-hard. Prefers men who have travelled overseas, Sentosa and Kusu Island not included. Hangs out usually include Holland Village.
Drive her here, dine her there. Carry her handbag too. Every month shopping must give maintenance fee. No car? No (f)luck. By the way, no sex either, got car or not. She has her 3 other real lovers on standby for that. Standby universe 24/7 to do her every bidding.
Every thing also emo and cry. Watch Captain America cry. Read Twilight also cry. See Newpaper headline also cry. Can’t decide what to wear also cry. Eat what cannot decide also cry. Never Whatsapp her for 30 mins also cry. Tell her you need to go toilet pee also cry. Basically cry everything. Have 3 packets of tissue on standby at all times.
Usually found between ages 25-32. Child-bearing age (or almost over) and bio-clock ticking damn fast. Will talk to you and show pics of all her friends getting married and having kids all the damn time. Peer pressure. Wants to drag you to every wedding of her friends, and to all the wedding roadshows in shopping malls. You’ve probably already know all her family members by name. BTO is her middle name. If not in a relationship already, she will be out hunting something fierce every weekend.
Wants to know where you’ve been yesterday, where you going today, what you doing now, how many friends last contacted you via Facebook messages, where you keep your passwords, why you went toilet never ask for permission, and also demands that you report HQ every 30 minutes. Your poor buddy gets mobilized and interrogated the moment you AWOL for more than 35 minutes.
The “I-Duno Leh”
Everything also “I duno leh.” “What’s wrong?” “I duno leh”. “Eat what?” “I duno leh.” “Where you wanna go?” “I Duno leh.” “What else you know besides I duno?” “I duno leh.” – You know?
Every Singaporean guy’s secret fantasy – he wants to do very naughty things to her, simply because her ah-lian image gives him the “rights” to do so. Will swear and cuss profusely in every sentence to maintain her sibeh fierce persona, and stare down every woman, man, baby, puppy and iguana. Also responsible for gangfights in and other similar staring incidents.
Congrats if you have a girlfriend who has almost every trait above.
Share this if you had a laugh, or have girlfriend(s) who can take a joke.
P.S. Need help? Dating can be complex in modern society. We understand. Free dating coaching (valued at $150) in Singapore is available. Let the male ego take a backseat and recognize that you may not know all the pieces of the puzzle. Take advantage of free dating coaching in Singapore… Click here!