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Why Do Men NOT Get A Second Date With Most Women?

(Disclaimer: We respect the privacy and confidentiality of our clients, graduates, and enquiries. The names & emails are masked for that very purpose.)

The title for this blog post should really be: “Why Do Most Men Only Get ONE Chance With Most Women?”

The reason for this post today, was from an email we received from a male reader/follower – which is actually a common question asked by many men in Singapore facing dating issues and problems.

Women usually would be too polite to comment, but they would most certainly share the same sentiments when amongst themselves and their closest friends. Hang around enough women and you’ll hear them bitch about horrible first date experiences.

Below is a screen shot of the email received:

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This is actually a very common occurrence for many men, especially in Singapore.

  • The girl finds its hard to turn him down the first date request… due to common friends in the social circle.
  • She was possibly under influence of alcohol during such a meeting (club setting), and gave her number without too much thought.
  • Likely to have a boyfriend, or a lot of other guys who are vying for her time and attention
  • The guy screwed up big time during the date, was either horribly boring, or just completely out of his own character by trying to impress too hard, or not her type

Let’s put this in the perspective of a relatively “average-to-hot” looking girl:

  • She has limited time in a day.
  • She probably has tons of men hitting on her at work and outside.
  • She may already be in a relationship.
  • She doesn’t have all the time in the world to experience one bad date, and still go on a second one.
  • If on average she has one guy a week calling/messaging her that much, she has a LOT to deal with that she doesn’t want to.

Reasons why a second date would never happen:

  • The guy failed to take the lead on date #1 and always sought to let her decide what to do, eat, etc
  • The guy was way too eager to impress her and was either braggy about his life, job, material possessions.
  • The guy did boring stuff like movies, awkward dinners, with even more awkward interview-style conversations.
  • The guy had very few options in his life, and it was obvious to the girl when he sounded desperate or needy in the way he talked about his life.
  • The guy was an “el cheapo” who was all for nitpicking the bill to the smallest item (yes it’s true especially with Singaporean men) — we don’t advocate paying for stuff just for her time and attention either. There’s a balance.
  • The date basically had very few emotionally-noteworthy moments for her, and was no different from the last 5 boring men she went out with.
  • And so on… and so forth.

Now put yourself in her shoes… would you go out with that same guy a second time? 

Be honest.

Not rocket science, yes?


NOTE: If you found this useful, and need an even more detailed plan of action to take from meeting to dating a girl, you definitely want to check out this post “If “Dating Girls” Is A Subject Taught In Singapore Schools!”… click here!



Now… This post isn’t really to offer a solution (which there are plenty of solutions out there, and it’s really easy to go on really fun dates click here to read an earlier blog post), but really more for guys to reflect… and think in terms of the girl’s position, to answer their own questions why they don’t get a second date.

If a girl is really into you… she would fight off hordes of zombies just to make time to see you, even for 30 mins.

If she’s ignoring your text or not picking up your calls for days to weeks… those are obvious signs that you screwed up.

And for a majority of Singaporean men trying to improve their dating lives, they keep repeating the same mistakes over and over again.

Chances are, you may be one of them, if you are reading this and feel like you can relate to everything I’ve mentioned.

It doesn’t have to be this way.

Learn why some men get it, and why most men don’t. 

Stop hurting and learn how to do it right.

To understand women at a deeper level, read this blog post.

Empower yourself.

Rooting for you,

Lead Instructor
ModernMan Academy


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P.S. Catch ModernMan Academy’s Dating Coaches On The Air With MediaCorp Radio 938LIVE’s DJ Angela Limclick here!

P.P.S. Need help? Dating can be complex in modern society. We understand. Free dating coaching (valued at $150) in Singapore is available. Let the male ego take a backseat and recognize that you may not know all the pieces of the puzzle. Take advantage of free dating coaching in Singapore… Click here!

P.P.P.S. There’s a lot more you can learn by signing up for our free newsletter. Comes with an exclusive E-Book “Top 5 Deadly Mistakes Men In Singapore Make With Women & Dating!” (Valued at $17)… Click here!

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